A Derry man has convinced one of the UK’s most prestigious department stores to sell him jars of Nutella bearing three rude names on them and even claimed one of them was his name in Irish.
The fad for having the jars of the famous chocolate spread personalised has become very strict in recent times. A little girl last year, for example, named after the Egyptian goddess Isis was refused her own jar because her name matched that of the Middle Eastern terrorist group.
This however did not deter Derryman Seamus O’Reilly, who now lives in London.
“Their set-up was fairly meticulous though; about four people working there — two at the front taking orders manning the tills, another at the back printing the labels, and usually a duty manager skulking around.
“Avoiding or bypassing these other workers became part of the thrill.”
He got the store workers to sell him jars bearing the words ‘bumgravy’ and ‘backdirt’. When it came to the final one however, the shop assistant asked some questions. When O’Reilly asked for the moniker ‘arsemuck’ to be placed on a Nutella label the assistant attempted to refuse him by stating the customer could not have it because it was rude.
It was then that the Derryman claimed to the shop worker that ‘arse’ was Gaelic for Arsenio.
“The previous two trips, I’d actually left the queue because I swore I saw the manager nudging staff and pointing me out.
“I like to imagine they have a mugshot of me back there, smiling innocently and, underneath, the words “NO MOR JARZ” smeared in thick, delicious, name brand hazelnut paste.”
“It’s kind of hard to come up with more that explicitly imply that there’s poo in the jar,” O’Reilly said. “I also don’t particularly like Nutella. And they’re pretty expensive.”
Here’s Seamas’s site - http://shocko.info/