Sir Alex Ferguson has more in common with Sheila Broflovski than he probably thinks. For the philistines amongst you Sheila is Kyle Broflovski’s mother in the animated series South Park.
When Sir Alex Ferguson blamed every other human being on planet earth for his current quandary this week, Sheila’s song ‘Blame Canada’ from ‘South Park the Movie’ could be heared emanating from my brain.
In the movie, the parents of all the South Park children, led by Sheila, decided that Canada was to blame for their little sprogs’ bad behaviour. The real reason behind the children’s unsavoury acts is that their parents permit them to watch an ‘offensive’ television programme called ‘Terrence and Philip’. So the parents have only themselves to blame. But instead of facing up to the reality of the situation, Sheila et al decide to practice the conveinent art of self-deception and blame Canada - and it’s hilarious.
Ferguson is an age-old practitioner of self-deception himself - rumour has it that he wrote the book on the subject. He is close to becoming somewhat of caricature of himself and his decision to apportion blame at the media’s and Jamie Carragher’s door this week just adds fuel to fire.
It’s extremely disenchanting because Ferguson is one of the most skilled and natural able managers that football has ever seen but he’s always on the defensive, he always thinks that there’s someone out to get him.
I know there’s the saying ‘that just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean that they are not out to get you’ but Ferguson makes Colonel Gaddafi look like Mother Theresa.
If you want a bit of an idea of just how paranoid Ferguson is, just type the words ‘Ferguson’ and ‘attacks’ into Google. ‘Ferguson attacks media over FA’, ‘Ferguson attacks Bayern’ and ‘Ferguson attacks referee Martin Atkinson’ are but a few examples.
Perhaps Ferguson’s bizarre grasp on reality would suggest that Dirk Kyut’s hat-trick against United last weekend is to blame for the tsunami in Japan, or maybe the reason there was snow yesterday was because the FA decided discipline him with a touchline ban for improper conduct. Stranger things have happened.
The 69 year-old Glaswegian doesn’t suffer fools gladly but his judgement has been all over the place for the last few years.
Earlier this week Ferguson was asked if he had sympathy for Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger after his side were dumped out of the Champions League by Barcelona. Ferguson replied: “I have sympathy for myself. I didn’t have an easy week myself.”
Ferguson went on to describe Jamie Carragher’s tackle on Nani in last weekend’s defeat to Liverpool as “disgraceful”.
Funny that - I don’t remember Ferguson lambasting former captain Roy Keane for ending the career of Alf-Inge Håland in 2001. The words ‘pot’, ‘kettle’, and ‘black’ come to mind
It doesn’t stop there. Ferguson stopped giving interviews to the BBC ever since a Panaroma show portrayed his football agent son Jason as a person who exploited his father’s influence and position.
Ferguson’s wounded relationship with the BBC has never healed. After the screening of the Panorama programme in 2004, Ferguson labelled the BBC as “arrogant beyond belief”. Surely the same can be said about the argumentative Scot. Despite warnings from the FA that he will be fined if he does not talk to the BBC he still refuses to do so.
Ferguson’s inability to realise his own hypocrisy will be a black mark on his lasting image. He’s probably a very nice man but when you continue to utter such bilge it’s only natural that people will label you a hypocrite and an ungracious loser.
Manchester United fans adore Ferguson. That’s hardly surprising - he has delivered unprecedented success over the years, after all. But if they can’t highlight his inconsistency then they are just as bad.
Just like the animated characters from South Park, Ferguson and his band of blind faith believers refuse to acknowledge just how silly they sound. Just like Shelia, Ferguson perpetuates the myth that everyone else is to blame but himself.
It wouldn’t surprise me at all if the elderly Scot was to all of sudden break into a rendition of ‘Blame Canada’ if Manchester United fail to win the league this year. Look on the bright side - it would much more entertaining than watching Rio Ferdinand lift any piece of silverware.