Seamus Fox, The Mindset Junkie: Self talk and how it can shape your mindset
This week I want to talk about a simple but often overlooked principle when it comes to shifting your mindset, behaviours and eventually outcomes in your life.
On the topic of self talk, this article focuses on all areas of life including family, business, finance and more!
Now I'm sure you have all probably heard of the term 'self talk' or maybe it is a new concept for you but even if you have heard of it before, there are lessons I want to share with you about how this is either supporting you or keeping you stuck in some way or form.
First of all I want you to recognise that you do talk to yourself. Go on, admit it! I bet that right now you're reading this thinking; 'I don’t talk to myself'. If so, then you have just recognised that you do talk to yourself but do you ever listen to what that voice is saying?
Most people never do but that constant to and fro and chitter chatter between the gaps of thoughts in your mind never really stops all day long and if you really paid attention to it you would soon learn how negative it can be and how you are either speaking into existence what you want or what you don’t want to show up in your life.
We have all heard of affirmations, right? An affirmation simply means to make firm in one's mind. It isn’t just a positive only statement like; “ I am always happy.” That's a fantasy and when you create affirmations like these you beat yourself up when it doesn’t happen.
But you shouldn’t as you and I are not always happy. Let's face it. At all stages of the day we experience all sorts of emotions. We are either happy, not so happy, annoyed or angry, frustrated and more and that is also okay. However, we can learn to be and feel more centred and balanced when we balance out our mind and our energy. How you speak to yourself has an influence on all of this. If I challenged you today to simply take a breath and to take a step back, maybe sit in silence and close your eyes and just listen, to pay attention to that internal chitter chatter, what would it say?
If you listen closely it might actually scare you and you might think you need to seek help and speak to someone professionally, especially when you start answering back! One voice is saying; 'You really should hit the gym. You said you would' while the other voice kicks in and says; 'sit down and watch that movie and eat that biscuit. You can train tomorrow!'
Sound familiar? I'm sure it does. I know I can relate for sure as we all have the mental confusion at times but the words we speak to ourselves are not just words, we have words that empower and we also have words that disempower so you really should become aware of what emotion and beliefs you are attaching to your own self talk, even if that is just internal right now.
Our words carry feelings and meaning that can set up beliefs and once engrained our behaviour begins to shape our reality around these belief systems. Over time they become buried deep in our minds that create automatic actions and reactions in our behaviours all day everyday. It is called living in autopilot mode.
"I can’t do that." "I am not good enough". "What would people think or say if I did x, y or z". The list goes on and on. People constantly talk themselves down and out of opportunity in life before they even take a step back to think differently or try to help themselves grow, and unless that changes, chances are the success or goals or position in life you really do want to be in are a long way away.
“You must change your concept of yourself." Empower yourself by using and repeating empowering words, statements, ideas and phrases that connect you with your aspirations and dreams that can help link you to the emotional energy frequency you want to feel. This can help you feel and behave in accordance with what you want.
Stop putting yourself down over and over again, stop telling yourself you can’t, you don’t deserve it etc. etc. Change the bullsh*t story that you keep repeating that is making you think and feel disempowered for something empowered, and start it now!
When you say; “I can't", you close your mind. When you say; “How do I make this happen?” or "What can I do to find a way?" we open the mind, we get creative.
Start each morning and end each day by affirming who you want to be, what you want to do and what you want to have in all areas of life. You have the ability to rewire those old stories and programmes in your mind that are not serving you right now. You can take back control of that chitter chatter and use it productively to keep you aligned with what is important to you.
Here are some words of power… "If they can do it, I can do it." "I am the author of my life." "I am a genius and I apply my wisdom." "I am abundant in all areas of life." "I take action daily on my highest priority actions that inspire me." "I am deserving of success, I attract it and accept it graciously." "I walk through the darkened doorway where fear lurks, and I turn on the light."
'I am' is more powerful than 'I will'. Create your own affirmation statements in the present tense as if they have already happened, do not set up fantasies in your mind that are unattainable. Eg. "I am always happy, never sad," - In this case your bullsh*t meter will go off and tell you it isn’t true so create affirmations around your goals and highest values and link them to what is truly important to you. Repetition is the first stage of learning so if you want them to have any impact repeat them day and night over a long period of time, until it is ingrained and you feel it in your very being and that your actions and results now begin to match up to what you have been affirming.