The time has come again, readers - my old habits have started to return and with deep regret and a sinking sense of “here we go again” I have had to start anew on a mission to control my eating habits and up my exercise levels.
Yes - there is no one more disappointed than me that a few of the lbs I lost early this year have crept back on again. I was close - so close - to being the lightest I had been in ten years but seem to have, somewhere, hit a self destruct button.
A bout of ill health knocked me off the exercise routine - and I fell into a big vat of (chocolate biscuit and bun filled) self pity and comfort ate a good half a stone back on.
So I’m looking at Christmas - and the party season and the (not so) Little Black Dress I have hanging in the wardrobe for the one and only big “do” of the festive season I have planned. It fits (meaning I can, just about, get into it) but as the lovely muscle tone I had developed in my arms, legs and yes - even under the layers of flab in my tummy has gone, it doesn’t look the best.
It’s a lovely 50s inspired frock, which I was hoping would help me create a little Mad Men inspired glamour. Instead I fear I may, in fact, just look like a woman in her 50s. And a very fat woman in her 50s at that. With a bad dress sense.
I have no one to blame but myself - and no one to challenge but myself. So thus begins the pre-Christmas (not so) Little Black Dress diet.
It’s never easy starting again. Least of all because I know people will be rolling their eyes and thinking “aye right, she never sticks to it” - but I have to appreciate how far I have come so far this year already. Even if I have backtracked on myself.
I am still a whole stone and a half lighter than I was in January - and while I would love to be further down the road to that elusive goal weight I can’t uneat the piggery of the last few weeks.
So I’m drawing that line. The evening cup of tea and biscuits will be curtailed. I don’t really need a bag of crisps with my lunch.
And I certainly don’t need to “treat” myself to quite so many bags of Maltesers even if I am sure they have a magical and medicinal healing quality.
So here we go dear friends - once more into the breach. The goal is December 14, a masquerade ball and the 50s inspired frock. As all my friends have the absolute cheek to be both skinny AND gorgeous, it’s a tall order. But sure - God loves a trier. I’m not throwing in the towel yet.