The Mindset Junkie: Are you afraid of energy vampires?

Let’s face it, fear holds so many of us back, myself included. It stopped me for so long, but not now.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I’m fearless as fear is useful. However, it’s the fear of small things that debilitate us. I simply decided to give that up.

I had put so many things off in my life that I wanted to do because of fear, but the more I studied and learned about myself and who I was, I realised I had a lot of deeper self image problems which caused that fear or imposter syndrome and it effected my confidence and more, so I went to work on them.

I suppose the more we dig and learn and progress within ourselves sometimes that feeling of fear subsides.

I am not saying you lose all sense of fear but as you get older you certainly care less about what other people think and that is one of the biggest fears that hold so many people back.

It keeps us stuck in a rut and never lets us pursue the journey we really could be on.

All because of a particular opinion which might be voiced by a friend, a loved one, a colleague or even worse, someone who doesn’t know you!

As humans, we all want to feel connected - it’s part of our DNA. We have evolved in tribes and communities and it’s part of how we view ourselves and the world, to want to be a part of that tribe, or the ‘in-crowd’.

But in order to grow or to really pursue what you feel is true to you, we need to step outside of that sometimes, to step outside of that circle that could be holding you back, but if we are afraid to upset that circle then we may never realise our true potential.

“Environment is the invisible hand that shapes human behaviour,” according to author of ‘Atomic Habits’, James Clear.

Is the environment you are in helping you grow, or is it holding you back?

You see when I needed to change my results in life I needed to change not only my own internal environment first, but my external environment also needed to change.

You’re probably familiar with the saying, ‘you are who you surround yourself with.’ This statement holds so much weight and is true because how we are influenced subconsciously by other people’s ideals, opinions and perspective on the world will play such a crucial part on how you experience the world and the results in life you achieve.

“Other people’s opinions are none of your business.”

Imagine you lived that statement. Everyone is allowed their opinion of you, but you should never ever let it decide your future!

Most people’s opinions from a negative standpoint about you are never really actually about you, more so about themselves.

You see, what others see and feel for you is also in them. It is usually a reflection of something they don’t have or do or experience within themselves, but it manifests in so many different ways. It’s never really about you!

I’ve learned over the years to put the blinkers on, just like a race horse who has one and only one objective which is to finish the race and pay no attention to anything else outside of those blinkers.

You see, we can all do that and it helps us in so many ways. It helps us stay focused when we need to. It helps us drown out other people’s noise when we don’t need to hear it and keeps you on target for what you really want to achieve in life.

The ‘energy vampires’ are everywhere but if you allow them to suck the life blood out of you it is your fault!

This is your life and your chance to live it how you want.

If you live it based on fear or on other people’s opinions, are you really being who you want to be? Or are you simply following the herd blindly never truly being you? Either way, it is a choice!

Your coach, Seamus Fox

Check out other relevant material and The Mindset Junkie podcast here