The Mindset Junkie: Do you have a goal? - A real goal?

Three per cent who have a plan for their lives and how they want to live it. In my seminars, there is probably one in 20 who say they have written goals. Why is that?

Well, for one, it isn’t taught. I certainly didn’t get taught how to set goals for myself. It was only when I’d finally had enough of the nonsense that kept appearing in my life that I decided ‘this needs to change!’

And everything changes with goals, but why? Well, because without a goal or a reason for what you do, you will probably end up chasing your tail for years wondering why you keep getting the same results. I know I did.

You might say, “But I just don’t have the energy for my goals.”

Really? You don’t need energy to achieve your goals. Yes, read that again. YOU DON’T NEED ENERGY TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS. What you need is a strong enough goal or reason for you to do what it takes to create the energy needed to attain that goal.

Not having the energy makes sense though and is common. I’ve found that if you feel this way it means you aren’t going after something that really means something to you but understand this, you are energy and it is abundant, you might just not be directing it towards something meaningful to you.

Once you identify what you really want, make a plan of how to get there. It won’t be clear at first and that is okay, because if it’s big enough, you’ll certainly not be clear at first or you would already have attained it.

Energy is abundant in us all. It’s what we are made up of, a mass of energy.

So when I hear from people I’ve coached, say they don’t have the energy, it’s not always true. Getting aligned and clear really helps change the direction you are headed and gives you the energy needed to pull you in that direction. You must want something and have a strong reason why, then you will have all that energy in abundance.

This is where most people fail, not knowing what they want. Again a lot of limiting ideas and beliefs about our capabilities stop us from even setting the goals in the first place. You must become clear on what it is you really want to achieve, and if the desire is there, so too will be the energy that you think you don’t have.

Too many of us get caught up in setting goals that mean nothing to us, then we wonder why they fail. Worse still, we achieve them then realise it’s not what we wanted. People write a list of goals as long as their arm that mean absolutely nothing to them. A goal should be a beacon, a guiding light, something that will direct all your future habits and activities. The first step to goal setting is finding out what it is you really need in your life and then why.

• Will this goal dramatically make your life better?

• Will it enhance your quality of living?

• Will it give you drive, energy and the desire needed to see it through?

If not, then there is a high chance that it won’t come to fruition, and much like the resolutions of every single January, it will be kept on the back burner until next year.

I love setting goals and I’m not bashing anyone for missing them, as I’ve made the same mistakes over and over. I’ve set goals that I thought I wanted, and actually achieved them only to be left feeling still unfulfilled and out a lot of time and energy.

Goals that aren’t in line with you or your values won’t leave you feeling happier, more content and definitely won’t inspire you. As the old saying goes: Be careful what you wish for, it might just come true!

Goals are the same, we chase other people’s goals only to find out when we reach them that they mean absolutely nothing to us. It’s not what you dreamed of, it’s certainly not what you want for the rest of your life, and you wonder why you spent so much time and effort listening to other people telling you to go after it.

A father tells his son or daughter, “Get good grades, go to university and follow in my footsteps and become a lawyer, a doctor, a teacher. Get a good job and security, just like your mother and I did.”

But this isnt you. This is your life, not theirs and while they mean well and want the best for you, it’s not their time or role to push you into something that is not your passion or calling. It might serve you well for a while but we all know that when some things just aren’t right, our gut feeling tells us so.

The worst thing is wasting a lot of time and years doing something you don’t want to do out of fear of trying something new. You will never get that time back again so plan wisely.

• What would you really love to do?

• What would you really love to be?

• Is it what you do every single day of your life right now?

• If not, why not?

Do you know that you have the ability to choose the direction you are heading at any time in your life? Do you know that if what has shown up in your life to this date isn’t what you want, it can be changed? You must first be aware of what you want to change, then take action.

You must believe you have so much more to offer to other people than maybe what you are doing right now, and if you are been reading up until this point, then its possible you do want something different??

I believe that we all have a gift but through life it can get hidden or unheard, squashed or swept aside, but I’ve also found that it all can change when the desire to change is there. What if we keep repeating the same patterns and habits all through our lives and never fully realise our true potential or what we are capable of? Does that scare you?

It scares me. Our lives are short and a blip in the grand scheme of things that happen in our world. At least make it something that we did on our terms and what we really wanted to do. Here’s a few tips for successful goal setting:

1. Set meaningful goals. Don’t follow someone else’s dream, follow your own intuition. It’s usually right.

2. Plan and prepare. Like anything, you need a plan of attack. Break your bigger goals down into smaller chunks. They seem less daunting and more easily managed. Expect and plan for curve balls and road blocks. Anything worth having rarely comes easily, so plan and prepare accordingly. Know that it’s only a hurdle, not a reason to stop.

3. Don’t give up. In my opinion, there isn’t anything worse than looking back and thinking I should have just tried, I wish I’d just tried. Regret is one of the most common things that people mention on their death beds. We get one crack at this life, as far as we know anyway! I’ve yet to see anyone come back and say anything different. So get after what it is you want from life. Don’t be that person who regrets everything in years to come.

If you have the ability to dream at will, don’t dream small. Think big, act big, be big.

We haven’t been created to shy away in the corner unheard and to live out other people’s dreams. This is your life and your chance.

So stand up!

Check out the Mindset Junkie podcast here