Chasing the aesthetic of perfection isn’t living - Hair To Go with Derry's Margaret Doherty & Co.
There’s a quiet pressure many of us are living under at the moment, and it’s rarely spoken about. It’s the pressure to be perfect, in our work, in our homes, in our appearance, and in how we present our lives to the outside world. And when we fall short of that impossible standard, we’re left feeling like we’ve failed.
But the truth is, trying to be perfect every single day is not only unrealistic, but it’s completely unsustainable.
As I continue hosting my academies this January, this is one of the messages I feel most strongly about sharing. Feeling like you didn’t meet someone else’s expectations, or even your own, doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. It doesn’t mean you stop, or give up, or walk away from something you care about. It simply means you’re human. Don’t ever think I have it all perfectly worked out, I don’t! I still make mistakes, I still get overwhelmed 18 years on. I’m human, I always know in my mind I’ll find a solution and keep moving forward.
Most people don’t talk about the moments that linger, the ones where you think you could have done better, handled something differently, or said the wrong thing. Those moments can knock your confidence if you let them. But they can also be the making of you, if you’re willing to learn from them.
Striving to do your best is a far healthier and more realistic goal than trying for perfection. Your best will look different from day to day. Some days, your best is delivering excellent work and feeling on top of everything. On other days, your best is just getting through the day and keeping things moving, both count.
No industry in the world operates at a level of perfection, despite what we’re often shown. Hairdressing, like many creative professions, involves people, emotions, expectations and constant change. Everyone has strengths. Everyone has weaknesses. The difference between those who grow and those who give up is not talent, it’s resilience.
Social media hasn’t helped this pressure. We’re constantly surrounded by carefully perfected images of “perfect” lives, spotless homes, flawless routines, and businesses that appear to run without a single hiccup. But that isn’t real life. It’s a highlight reel.
Truth be told, chasing that level of aesthetic perfection isn’t living, it’s pretending. Nobody posts the stress, the self-doubt, the mistakes, or the days when everything feels like hard work. Comparing your real life to someone else’s edited version is a guaranteed way to feel like you’re falling behind, even when you’re not.
Mistakes are often seen as something to be avoided at all costs, but in reality, they’re where the real learning happens. Mistakes don’t make you less capable, they make you wiser. They build knowledge, confidence and depth. A good outcome feels good, but it’s failure that sharpens you.
So if you’ve had a day where you feel you didn’t do your best work, or didn’t show up as the person you wanted to be, don’t let that define you. Acknowledge it. Learn from it. Adjust. And keep moving forward.
Progress will always matter more than perfection. And a real, honest life will always be worth more than a polished illusion.
Love Margaret.