Let’s have no more murders like that of my nephew Andrew Allen - ongoing violence damages generations of our children

In those days, some 25 years ago, despite obstacles in the political process and trouble erupting at various flashpoints, there was still an air of uneasy optimism. As we emerged through a small wooded area on the edge of an interface, we heard the sound of bottles smashing on the road, and various volleys of abuse shouted in what seemed to me to be high pitched voices.

Walking very carefully towards an exit that led to the road, we then heard a shout of ‘The Orangemen are coming through the woods’. I was certain that this was the voice of a child and, as we came in sight of the road, I could clearly see that the people on ‘both sides’ engaged in hurling abuse, bottles and stones were all young children. One of them came across to me and said: “Mister, mister there’s a tree down there with a fairy in it, and if you can open the door you get magic powers. Could you see if you can open it?”

When a report later emerged in 1999 suggesting that very young children in NI were capable of sectarianism, it therefore came as no surprise to me. I guess it is easy enough for young minds who believe in fairytales to also come to believe that ‘monsters’ live on the other side of the road.

The report noted: “The expression of sectarianism among children is rooted in their day-to-day experiences. For some, it appears to provide the interpretative lens through which they develop a keen interest in and understanding of the news and politics of the conflict.

“The findings of the exploratory study would appear to suggest that children are not passive receptacles to be filled with the sectarian beliefs and value-systems of their parents but are actively and competently involved in appropriating, re-working and reproducing these sectarian beliefs in order to make sense of their own experiences.”

I think the issue goes well beyond sectarianism. Children are shaped by the world they live in, and where violence has become too normal to be healthy, what chance does the child have?

A 2011 study by Ulster University - led by Siobhan O’Neill who has continued to do excellent work in this field and is now NI’s Mental Health Champion - found that Northern Ireland has the highest recorded rate of post-traumatic stress disorder of any studied country in the world.

The region also continued to have the highest suicide rate in the UK or Ireland.

I think everyone can agree that exposing children and young people to violence and hatred is not the way in which any of us wants to live. And yet it continues to happen, thankfully on a much smaller scale, but it is still having an adverse impact and the insidious nature of hate-fuelled violence still seeps into the soul of our society. Its victims include those we should cherish most - our children.

In Derry, nationalist areas in particular have witnessed campaigns of violence mostly carried out by the now defunct Republican Action Against Drugs and the Real IRA - now merged as the New IRA. While some of the attacks have been aimed at the PSNI, those tended to be unsuccessful, and most violence has involved shootings of people within the community.

Combined with the generational impact of the Troubles and the ongoing, though episodic violence, is a lack of help for the younger people in communities. Despite the claims of massive injections of funding to benefit areas, there remain those who feel marginalized and isolated and who don’t reap the benefits of financial windfalls. Nor is the necessary level of help available for those of all ages who suffer from deprivation and mental ill health.

As Ms O’Neill said just five years ago: “There is no overarching mental health strategy to drive provision in a systematic manner. There are huge waiting lists for services, and the provision of early intervention services for young people is particularly poor. People in Northern Ireland wait longer for treatment for mental illness and their conditions invariably worsen.”

It’s bad enough when those in positions of political and community leadership are seemingly unable to provide solutions to the deeper issues faced in our communities, without having the added factor of the damage being done by those who are hell-bent on violence. There has been so much reportage now that these people cannot claim to be unaware of the impact of a generation of serious violence on all of us. Yet all warnings that what they are doing does not work seem to fall on infertile ground.

And so the violence goes on. Ten years ago on February 9, 2012, my nephew Andrew Allen was murdered by dissidents. His murder in Buncrana was claimed by RAAD. It sparked a number of rallies attended by a significant number of young people. As is usually the case when those who know they have seriously messed up want to justify themselves, RAAD, having murdered Andrew, then tried to destroy his name and reputation. So not only did we have to deal with his murder, we had to deal with the character assassination the murderers perpetrated to try to justify what they had done.

I said at the time that they were not just murderers, they were incorrigible liars and I stand by that.

The pain and impact of Andrew’s murder was unlike anything I have ever felt before. I felt a level of anger that I’d never previously experienced. And I know that while it hurts me as his uncle, I know that the agony this caused his parents and siblings, his partner and children is much, much worse.

I still shudder when I remember, just a few days after his funeral, I was sitting at the kitchen table in his mother Donna’s house. All of a sudden a heavy rainstorm started and Donna ran to the window and screamed: “My wain’s lying out in that.” She was inconsolable.

It made me think that those who say childbirth is the worst pain a woman can feel are lucky if they don’t know how child death feels.

We didn’t need the Garda to tell us that Andrew was not the person RAAD claimed him to be but we were still glad when, following a painful inquest in 2019, Detective Inspector Pat O’Donnell confirmed to the world that the statement issued by RAAD was “rubbish”.

The truth about Andrew is that he was a young man trying to make his way in life. He was unemployed but looking for work. He loved boxing and talked a lot about taking up the sport again in Buncrana.The evening prior to his murder he texted a friend who worked in a fast food shop asking if he could get him a job there.

But the following evening, as he lay on a bed in the house he was living in with his partner, Arlene, Andrew was playing an online video game remotely with his nephew when a gunman shot him through the downstairs window.

The bed was downstairs as it had been adapted for a disabled person and far from being a drugs king pin in a large home, Andrew was living rent free in a house owned by his partner’s sister who was in the USA. They were house-sitting.

Only those who have suffered the murder of a loved one and then seen their name dragged through the gutter can understand the level of additional pain this inflicts on a family.

I can’t even begin to imagine how his partner, parents and siblings felt at Andrew’s death and the brutal manner in which it happened. If any consolation can be taken from the situation, it’s that he died in the arms of a loving partner. That’s something that Arlene will have to live through every day for the rest of her life.

I saw their pain and as bad as I felt myself, I knew my hurt was almost insignificant when compared to theirs. I’ve never known anger like it - or felt such hate. One day, when Andrew had not long been laid to rest with his grandfather after whom he was named, the anger overwhelmed me. I think the stress and my being prone to nosebleeds led to the mother of all nosebleeds as I was taking my anger out on a punchbag left behind in our garage by one of my stepsons. As I punched as hard as I could, the blood was hurled off in all directions until the tears came and I collapsed into an old armchair.

Small things would set me off, like when Andrew’s friend posted on Facebook a picture of his grave with a new addition to the ornaments placed there and the message ‘Here you go Andy, there’s the candle I promised you.’

There is an oppressive ambience that I feel surrounds death at any time, and when it involves the murder and death of a young man so long before his time, the weight of grief is suffocating.

Ten years on, young relatives who remember Andrew, including his children as well as nephews and nieces who never had the chance to know him, are among the regular visitors to his grave. On the occasion of every wedding, baptism, First Communion or Confirmation, birthday or Christmas and New Year, old and young - friends as well as family - gather at the foot of his grave in loving acknowledgement that his presence was missing at these joyful events.

The damage done that awful night ten years ago still impacts today; its effects ripple through generations and that can clearly be seen.

Since Andrew’s murder, a number of people have been maimed in Derry while inspirational young journalist, Lyra McKee was murdered while observing serious disturbances in Creggan.

And there have been a number of occasions when primary school aged children have been involved in riots.

When they might have otherwise been snuggled up safely in bed, listening to stories about pixies and fairies.